complicated

guess what??? yesterday another midnight call. not 1 but 2 - 3 times. end up sleep at 2am in the morning. today 9 must wake up summore. damn sleep. i turn off the alarm continue sleep. nearly late for tuition. haha ^^ hmph. yesterday was kinda confuse and sorry for making u kinda angry. but what i say is a fact. u wan leave her??? no way ~ i wont let u do it because of me. ish. why must he understand me so much until he know i fall for him. and how he know that i also dont really know my feelings and not sure yet? gosh. he really understands me. is good in a way. but bad in another way. ishz. so what should i do??? i am really sorry i cant accept that because of me u wan leave her. u say this is all u waited for all this while??? since the first time u chat with me. even though i love cy but actually u love me le. wth. u know i love him and u wont have a chance so u find her??? omg. why must u be so funny har??? and now you say you and her don't suit ??? you prefer me??? omg. u are making me confused le. but i guess i will repeat the same thing like what i say on the phone yesterday. i don't want because of hurt tiok a 14 year old girl. i dont want her to hate love. i know i am stupid to do so but i feel is unfair to that girl. i also don't know why. in the first place you shouldn't know that 'him' is who. why must u so understand me??? really sorry if i keep repeat the same thing and make u angry. but i must still say it. i dont want because of me u hurt her. no matter what u have feelings on her before. so be responsible ya. you make me confuse. don't know want how now. haha. you slowly think what i say is true or not le. haha. ^^ no matter what we are still friends ma. dont worry

words & pictures

haha. i guess this is the 2nd post for today. wanted to go harvest inn and try mana tau tak buka. so went to salsas. as usual. so long bo see tiok igor. today saw him there. i nearly forget take my camera back le. haha. pheww. then these are the pictures i took for today. and the last 2 picture is dedicated to winnie. she wants to see me with my hair tied up ^^. and just now at aunt house web-caming with winnie then i go watch tv. then i ate magee mee for dinner. 1 more thing. he found out that she fall for him already. what must she do??? omg. so scary. but she still hope that even he know but he will still love and continue be with his gf. dont because of her . his relation ship become worse. and please dun say that she is naive. she just dont want to break people's happiness. he shouldn't have know about her falling for him. but i guess he really understand her thats why he know. OMG !!! i miss her so much. i mean my god ma. last time she very sayang me and love me. but after she get marry and have kids she went to KL. so very less can meet her. just now she called me. just put down the phone. miss her so muchie. she say she will be back on the 18. she will come and find me. go kek lok si together and also go penang hill . can't wait le. miss her so much. hearts her. she ask me about my studies, my life, and DO I HAVE A BOYFRIEND ??? haha. i say no. she say when i am 30 only find. haha. funny le she. miss her alot. really memories. last time always she will buy gifts for me. very sayang me. i hope she is still here in pg. so she can still so sayang me. haha. but even though she at KL now. every year she will send gifts to me also ^^

in the car ^^
a smile from me to you . ilyreaching my hand to get you
harvest in cafe
mushroom soup at salsas ^^
desert ^^
this picture and the picture below is dedicated to winnie [ so want to see i tie my hair ]
love you ^^

i want you more than gold or silver,
only you can satisfy,
you alone are the real joy giver,
and the apple of my eye.

a poem from me to you m.

~signing off ~
lonelybabiie

midnight call ^^

yesterday i slept at 2am in the morning. haha. was kinda confused le. then around 12 like that max msg me. ask me why havent sleep i ma say cant sleep lo. he straight phone me. walaoeh. i forget put silence and i was in my parents room. so faster reject. mana tau call again. no choice have to answer. then talk talk talk. talk until 12.30 like that put down the phone. actually talk until very happy eh. but in the end i feel like crying after knowing a few things. haiya. never mind liao. if not let him say again. and hor max khaw. if u see this i want to tell you that i am over him. i have no feeling with him. so when u ask me about him i will say so??? haha. like what u say i deserve better. then around 12.55 nic msg me. and say. ask u msg me why u never msg me??? never mind liao la. nights. he sound so damn angry. kinda scarty le. so i reply him. but hor u say u will msg me not i msg u la. haha. then i never reply anyone; i still cant sleep. max ask me to msg him if i cant sleep, should i ??? i guess not. haha. feel that having myself is enough. dont want to think so much already. ^^ anyway thanks ya. today start from just now cant stop msg. 1 by 1 finish reply next 1 come. sms-ing with 4 ppl at one time. will go crazy. and i took a few pics. will upload tonight. haha ^^

history repeat ???

last night. too boring until take story book and read. while reading i am sms-ing. with kinda alot of people. but i dont know why i hate it when i msg with mr. m . damn frustrating. send 1 msg to him after 30 mins or 1 hours only reply. better dun reply. so in the end never msg with him. i read story book read until 12+ then close the book. msg everyone good night then close the light. and then lie down on my bed. and i was wondering why is the history repeating again??? i also dont know why. just feel very useless. but last night i know a few things that make me feel better. but feel better got what use? cant be together also la. so just forget about it.

just woke up not long ago. stomach pain. ish. stupid nia. actualy 10 something wan wake up eh. but stomach too pain cnt wake up so sleep until 12 only wake up. wake up nia straight bathe but now still pain. ishz. online not long nia someone oii me. guess who??? nicholas using daryl msn oi me. ish. ask me go gurney. that day wednesday at gurney time he msg me ask me go gurney i thought he was there mana tau is ask me today go. wanted to go but stomach pain. sorry ya. not i kesi kesi. and also sorry always you ask me out i sure cnt. but i hope during this holiday really can go out with u. lone time no see want to see u become how PRETTY liao. wakakaka. talk about him now must go check hp. see he got msg. so i guess that's all. ltr 2 got ttn. after ttn i come back home i guess i dont wan go out liao ^^

chaoz

~signing off~
lonelybabiie

damn frustrated

yesterday when my father come back from work i think he and my mummy mood no good. they saw the money on the table. and say ' you forget to pay teacher again? ' then i was like ' umm, umm. sorry' then they start to scold crazy a you? keep watch tv online until what also forget. ltr teacher thought we dont wan pay her. please la okay. teacher not so money face wan. next week monday can pay her. is you all think too much. so after that whole day until now never talk to them a single word. because last night 9 i went to bed. around 10 wake up msg msg. then fall asleep until just now someone call me. and hor i know you will read my blog eh. so i wan tell you again. dont nsay sorry to me le ya. i say many many times. if you say sorry again i WONT chai u anymore ^^ so dun say le. i say already past let it pass i forgive u. but promise u wont repeat the same mistake u did to me to other girls. rather let u hurt me one person then u keep on hurting others. so dont hurt others ya. monkey ^^ . today will be another boring day. sien nia. whole day at home do nothing. bo crazy also will become crazy ^^

~ signing off ~
lonelybabiie

i feel kinda regret

after yesterday i don't know what am i thinking. last few days he called me. for what??? i don't know what is it for. want to hurt me once more??? before this i feel happy talking with him. but why after yesterday everything change. i dont know whether do i still love him or not. i guess the feelings fade already. i suddenly think of him. when i talk to you i will remember the times u hurt me. hurt me deeply and who is the one who is there for me. who cheer me up when i am sad. i was loving you all the time but he is cheering me up. he never give up from making me sad to happy. but when the time he tell me things and when he need me i hurt his feeling badly. really badly. after that day i think everything changes. even though when i am sad he will cheer me up. but is different than last time already. i dont know why i suddenly feel very sad very confuse. what is happening to me? who i really love??? but i guess everything changes already. i will loose both of them at once. i miss him. haiz

~ what a day ^^

yesterday went to aunt house to bake cookies ^^ kinda yummy !!!

today morning because of that MRS. BANZ i must wake up at 9 then in the end she come late. thanks to her i wake up so early. haha. today sit bus time so many things happen. me and janice keep laughing laugh until janice beh tahan. haha. shhh . shhh. janice know what am i saying??? haha. then max phone me say he reach and ask where am i. haha. then i ask him go find vicky. both of them so pai seh. but when i reach max come find me and his 3 friends. haha. then he say he take me go eat. all boys takkan i alone girl go follow him meh??? haha. sure pull vic with me le. haha. then jan wait for HIM [ as usual le always late ] wakakaka. then we went to food & tea. haha. me and vic share sandwich. then the boys order 1 set each. wow. very cheesy le they eat eh. max ask me wan or not. but too bad i am full. haha. you all must try. [ below toys r us 2nd floor ] cheap and nice. haha. after eat go cinema there find janice and HIM. they buying drink lining up. lazy wait so me, vic and max go in cinema first. from left [ max . me . vic . jan . pk ] haha. then suddenly max eh fren all also watch the same movie love problems. haha they sit a row behind us. haha. so shock. inside the cinema damn damn cold. summore let that MR.Max bully. but his hand damn warm le. then he say me gai. always also let him say me. each time he say i was pek chek but in the end also laugh. haha. cannot act angry. haha. then jan and vic say he look diff in his pic and that day mcd. i guess they wan to say he look much more handsome a??? wakakaka. handsome meh???? haha . then keep let pk say me. hate it ke. but funny also. then after movie boys go toilet we go down. pk ask " later he come out from toilet cnt find u how a? " i answer " he wan find me then will msg me eh" he go toilet none of my business. summore let that vic say me and him ngam??? kinda regret the decision i make last time but i think is too late. haha. friends are better. then we wait for wb mana tau he go qb. then i chia vicky eat big apple donut. then meet her vivien. then they wan go home. i takkan be jan and pk eh lamp post ma. so i go red box find max. he bring me in. mana tau all girls le. feel so paiseh. but they look familiar le. they kinda friendly keep look at me and smile then say hello. introduce themself. then they say i look familiar . bla bla bla. then i see them sing. max also sing. i was msging with nic, cj, jan, vic. he snatch my phone see my things. when msg come in 1 by one he pek chek.. eng kai. haha. then the song they sing give me alot of memories. last time eh memories all. so i cnt tahan and feel dun wan disturb the girls sing i want go find jan. so i tell max. then he give me a look and say yor. you ar.... then the girls look at me and say good bye. then go play ground find jan. damn hot. they all siao wan. can sit so long. crazy. then i say i wan go in. we walk then go in. feel much more better. pk let me scold till kao kao. eng kai le. keep say me. hha. then my parents say they come already then i took them go the place where i eat my lunch. ate the cheesy thing. cant finish. haha. very full. now i am back. at home. bath finish. now on9-ing . will watch love is beautiful later. this show very old le. but now only i watch. damn nice. very touching. haha.
pitures will be uploaded other time ^^

~signing off~
lonelybabiie